Mariano Rivera tore his ACL shagging flies.
Mariano, one should always shag flies doggy style. Yeah baby, am I making you randy? If there had been Angels in the outfield, would he have shagged them too? Yeah baby, forget beastiality, we’re kinky with cherubiality. Rrr rrr.
A dentist pulled out all of her ex-boyfriend's teeth when he came to see her after he broke up with her for another woman.
This was really stupid on her part. You leave one tooth in the front for comedic purposes. Everyone knows that.
Today is Cinco De Mayo.
Which is from the latin for lining up your Hellman’s Jars. Can’t think of a better reason to drink a marg.