Friday, September 14, 2012

Talkin'

The Funner is talkin’…bout this and that and that and uh…
Kate Middleton had her picture taken… when she was topless…and England is pissed. Ah the British, so stuffy. She’s young, she’s pretty, and she’s royal now, what’s the big deal about exposed mammaries? Mammary, mammary, speak to me mammary. I just hope they don’t go crazy and have some hooligans turn over a dust bin in Shaftsbury.
And the presidential campaigning is heating up…if you like that sort of thing. Kinda like having a hot sewing needle inserted into your pupil. He said this, he said that. It’s like the 8th grade with Teleprompters. Did you see Mitt in phys ed? Gross.
And how bout this movie sparking protests in the Middle East? Where the hell were they when Breakin’ II Electric Boogaloo was made? Talk about a movie we should protest. That and Moulin Rouge.
The NFL enters week 2 this Sunday and somehow, the Browns have already been mathematically eliminated from the NFL’s Jacuzzi tubs. The Browns have had more high draft picks than the Army in Vietnam and yet, not one sighting of Agent Orange in one Cincinnati Bengal! Where is Herm Edwards when you need him? We play to win the game. Unless you are Pat Shurmur. “Shurmur High School Shurmur Illinois.” Apparently Pat Shurmur is in some sort of love triangle with Brandon Weedon and overthrown balls. And by overthrown balls, I mean overthrown balls.
In worse quarterback news, Mark Sanchez is dating Eva Longoria. Hey Mark you got nothing on Tim Couch. Tim used to bang former playmate of the year Heather Kozar… and without Tim Tebow around saying “dude, you should wait until marriage.”

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