NPR's ‘5 Things You May Not Know About’ the republican candidates.

NPR is running its ‘5 Things You May Not Know About’ the republican candidates.

You’re right NPR but I do know this:

Jon Huntsman dropped out of high school — but he did graduate from college. In 1978, Huntsman quit school to play keyboards in the rock band Wizard. Just the president we need to encourage the kids to stay in school. Oh and by the way, when you name your rock band Wizard, it soon becomes apparent you will be the backing band for mediaeval inspired pornos.

Michelle Bachmann met her husband on a playground. Michele and her husband, Marcus, met when they were students at Winona State University. According to a 2007 profile in the Minneapolis Star-Tribune, they both had jobs as playground supervisors at an elementary school near the college. Marcus was there to meet guys but when in Rome… (this is not a reference to her vag being like rome, too many catholics in her vag. Kid, I kid)

Rick Perry loves The Wizard of Oz. "During our interview," wrote veteran Perry watcher Paul Burka in a 2002 Texas Monthly profile, Gov. Perry "mentioned that his 'favorite movie of all time' is The Wizard of Oz. For him it has lessons that translate to politics. (No, no, it's not that you can get along without a brain.) To Perry, political power is often an illusion, a little man behind a curtain projecting an image." This is good news because for Herman Cain, it was something else projecting.

Ron Paul can deliver. As a doctor in Texas, Kwiatkowski says, Paul delivered more than 4,000 babies over the years. Why Herman Cain had him delivering babies as opposed to a large with extra cheese is still a mystery.

Mitt Romney was once accused of "trying to bribe" a park ranger. In his new book, Mitt Romney: An Inside Look at the Man and His Politics, author Ronald B. Scott writes that when Romney was a young father, he led a family outing to a state park in Massachusetts. When Romney got ready to launch his unlicensed boat, a park ranger said it would cost him $50 if he did. Romney offered the ranger the money, was accused of trying to bribe the ranger, and was arrested for disorderly conduct. Hey Mitt, your attempted bribe of $50 was a slap in the face to that ranger. Now in the park restroom $50 will get you somewhere but not at the docks.

Newt Gingrich met his first wife, Jackie, when he was a 16-year-old high school student in Columbus, Ga. Jackie was his 23-year-old math teacher. This gives new meaning to helping Newt after school with his parabolas.

Michelle Bachmann Photographer Tries His Best

I feel for the photographer on this one. Remember how she never looked at the camera for an entire rebuttal. Imagine only getting 5 minutes. “please look this way, right into the camera, no not up there! Why are you looking up there? Here right in here [points at camera lens]. Still with the skyward glance. Look in the lens, there’s a picture of Obamacare in there.”

7/21/11 monologue

Well (tear) the shuttle Atlantis fell back to Earth this morning, to close out NASA's 135th and final shuttle voyage, a long-awaited--and long-dreaded--milestone marking the end of an era for American manned space flight.

Sad. But consider that the 405 is open again and, I might add, ahead of schedule. Priorities people.

Kim Kardashian is going to sue Old Navy for Using Look-Alike in an advertisement.

This’ll be the only time I ever want to sit on a jury. Who wouldn’t want to? Just comparing badonkadonks all day? “We’re still not sure your honor.”

Eric Dane, who plays the hunky Dr. Mark Sloan on Grey's Anatomy, went to rehab for an addiction to painkillers earlier this summer.

                The plot lines of the show were just, just so painful.

Presidential hopeful Michelle Bachmann is adamant that her migraines won't impede her White House goals.

Of course, she thinks she’s referring to her barley, oats, and buckwheat but we won’t break the news to her.