Captain and Officer

Captain: what do you have on this downtown incident?

Officer: seems the guy was ex-military, former navy walrus.

Captain: that is seal you idiot.

Officer: I’m not an idiot. And neither is Seal. He’s ugly but no man banging Heidi Klum is an idiot.

Captain: dammit! What else do you have on this guy?

Officer: Not much captain. He came in blasting and left blasting. Customers dropped to the floor. They are all just reporting that he wore gel-kayano’s and had hairy ankles.

Captain: what did he get away with?

Officer: Armed robbery sir.

Captain: dammit! I know that. How much?

Officer: not much captain, 10k or so.

Captain: what about video footage.

Officer: nothing from the bank but a couple customers recorded from their phones.

Captain: great, what do we got.

Officer: Well sir he wore gel-kayano’s and had hairy ankles.

Captain: dammit! We can get a how-to-do your own heart surgery on youtube and all we get are the guy’s ankles!

Officer: some of the shins too. They are hairy as well.

Captain: right. Let’s put out an APB on this guy. Wait, how do you know he was ex-military?

Officer: He dropped his business card. After Iraq he went into home decorating and chimney sweeping.